![]() Jary is the open act in a show call "Carot Top Present: The Originel King's Of Prop Comady Tour". The city is Des Moine, Iowa, and the theater smell faint of urine. "Hows every one doing," Jary dispasionately ask crowd of about 100 as they trickel into theater. Even though hes breathe in New York City smog basicly, to Garge the air taste sweete and crisp as a cucumbre pull fresh from the earth.īravely, Garge step forwerd into unfamilliar new modarn world. When he step thru the gates he take a deep breathe of his first taste of fredem. So why was Garge in jail for 15 year's? Honestly its because he shanked a prisener in the face in 2002.Īnyway, so Garge FINALY get release from Rikers Islend, its like a New york prisen located near La Guardea Internationel Air Port. OK, I see you doing the math: one year for the originel sentance, plus 12 year's for the manslauter charge = 13. Anyway where was I oh yeah: so on top of the one year sentence for violate "good samariten law" the juge add another 12 years. I dont know why your so shocked bro, this happen prety much EVERY DAY in america. He planed this murder for severel monththruout seasen 7 (but obviosly Garge dont know it as Seasen 7, to him life is real Im just saying Seasen 7 so you have a refrence point).ĭuring the trial long story short Garge utiliaze african amerecan lawyer Jacky Child who basicaly manipelate the legal sys and get Garge off with a much smaler charge than he deserve. After he feel she have no pulse, he say "good nite swete princess." Then he throw the doll that look like he's mom directly in the garbege can and then he practece he's most distress voice and dial 9-1-1. Then when Suzette was to weak to continue lick the enveloapes, Garge took he's New York Yankeys couch pillow and put it over Suzette face until shes no longer breathe. He raise hes voice: "if your serious about this mariage you will continue lick the enveloapes." But the high profiale case opened up an investagation into the murder of Garges fiancey, or watever, however you spell it, you know what Im talking about, Suzette, the woman who he was engage to but then kill by purpesely buy poisen enveloapes and then making her lick 200 of them consecutive, just one after another, one after another, even after Suzette say "I think these enveloapes containe poisen," Garge say "Suzette dont be a duche bag, keep lick those enveloapes" you know things of this nature. He went in to prisen in 1998 with he's best frends Jary Elane and Kragdar for violating the "good samariten law" in the small Masechuset's town of Latham, Masechuset's.Īt the time, the jugde Art Vandalay only sentance the gang to just one year in prisen. ![]() If you want to know how many year's he lived in the darkness exactly, its like dude why dont you chill out because Im about to get to it rite now: fifteen year's. Its because he did not stand beneath natural sun light for so many years. And not because some one squirt grape fruit juice in his eye. And not because hes not wearing his glases. Today Gawker published the first installment The Apple Store, an original self-published novel by… An interview with author of The Apple Store You can read an interview Gawker conducted with about The Apple Store here. gave Gawker permission to republish The Apple Store in full, so everyone on the internet can delight in the criminal exploits of Jary, Elane, Garge and Kragdar. ![]() But last Friday, SmashWords notified him that it had removed the book in response to a copyright request from Warner Brothers. The Apple Store is a deranged Seinfeld fanfic s elf-published The Apple Store in April through. Like imagines a world in which Seinfeld is still on the air today, placing the ’90s' favorite sitcom characters in contemporary situations. Today Gawker is pleased to present the first of a three-part serialization of the novel The Apple Store, by " is the online persona of an anonymous Seinfeld fanatic, created originally to spoof the hugely popular Twitter account.
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